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1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. If this student were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.
3. It is impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
4. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
5. The student has a ‘full six-pack’ but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
6. This child has been working with glue too much.
7. When your daughter’s …

We like to barbecue. We will only cook if danger is involved.
His two favorite words…  “Blow Job” learn it, live it, love it.  Got it?
If you buy a man a video camera, for the first few weeks he has it, lock the door when you go to the bathroom. Most of my early films end with a scream and a flush.
When we ask for a threesome with you and your best friend, we are only joking.  (Unless the answer is yes.)
Men are very confident people.  So confident …

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